Everyone has a fear place they go to.

Something unexpected happens in your business

—a prospective client says no

—an employee quits

—someone is rude to you

—a contract gets messed up

and you feel doubt, so you climb into the comfortable bed in the dark room: the room of Fear.

Everyone has turned to fear before. This is part of the human experience.

The important question is, what do you do after you have decided to sit in the dark room and feel fearful?

If life was a movie, and you were both the director and the main character, you could direct yourself out of that room. Obviously, staying in fear won’t help you resolve any business or money issues, so you can direct yourself to do something that will make you feel better.

However, this is not always what happens. In your fear room, you may feed yourself more fear. Treating yourself like a victim, you tell yourself negative things about yourself, your value, and your abilities.

It’s almost like an addiction…you cannot help but feed yourself more negativity.

Are you addicted to fear?

All of this is in your hands.

You have the ability to walk away from that pattern.

Begin, by noticing. Your awareness is the most valuable tool you can use to pull out of fear.


Something negative happens.

You go to your fearful emotions.

You notice: here I am again in my fear room.

You notice that it sucks here.

Your awareness kicks in: Oh gosh, I am doing it again. I am feeding myself fear.

You remember there is a tool (be sure to know your top 5 tools that pull you out of fearful thinking).

You use a tool.

You feel better.

What are your 5 top tools that pull you out of fear?

Here are a few of mine:

  1. Go outside. This is an instant reset button for me. No matter what the weather is like outside, it always helps to just feel the elements outdoors.
  2. Fear to Faith Affirmations. Draw two columns on a piece of paper. Write down your fears in the left column, then write down the exact opposite of each one, in the form of an affirmation in the corresponding spot in the right column. Reread your affirmations as needed.
  3. Notice that even though this one situation didn’t turn out exactly like you wanted, that everything is okay. You have a roof over your head, yummy food in the kitchen, a comfy bed, and people and pets that love you. These are the basics, for starters. Dig deeper and you will see that you have so much more than even the basics. Begin looking for things to feel grateful for at every turn.
  4. Talk to someone who cares for you. This should be someone who is not a negative thinker, as this type of person will keep you in fear, because that is where they live, 24/7, so they are going to normalize this for you. Instead choose someone you know will feel more uplifting to talk to.
  5. Give to someone else. One of the best ways to jump out of the fear seat, is to get up and help someone else. This gets you focused on someone other than yourself, which can be gratifying and rewarding. It can also boost your self-esteem, which you will need to stay out of the fear trap.

Gabby Bernstein, said in her book The Universe Has Your Back:

“Another way to surrender to the power of the Universe is to get clear about how the stories and beliefs we carry dictate our experiences. A Course in Miracles teaches us that projection is perception. This means that whatever stories you’re projecting in your mind are what you’re perceiving in your life.”

Life really is a choice. You can be a victim of life, or a warrior.

I see you as a warrior.

Be a Warrior, Not a Victim (1)











Heidi Carter